The Wisdom of a Broken Heart: An Uncommon Guide to Healing, Insight, and Love by Susan Piver
The New York Times bestselling author of The Hard Questions and relationship columnist for Body & Soul looks at the hardest part of a relationshipaˆ”heartbreakaˆ”and provides a practical, steadying, compassionate plan for emerging a stronger, braver, spiritually transformed person.
The heart that is broken has been broken open, writes Susan Piver. When my heart was broken, it changed my life.aˆ¦From this most painful experience came the ability to find and appreciate lasting love. The anguish and disappointment of a broken heart is devastating and overwhelming, but as Susan Piver reveals in The Wisdom of a Broken Heart, it can also create an opportunity for genuine spiritual transformation, paradoxically leaving one both stronger and softeraˆ”and capable of loving even more deeply than before.
Filled with on-the-spot practices, exercises, funny stories (often drawn from her own experience), poems, meditations, exercises, and down-to-earth, practical advice on how to cope with day-to-day miseries, The Wisdom of a Broken Heart offers a priceless prescription of solace and encouragement, wisdom and humor. Like an infinitely patient, trusted friend, it tells its readers in a thousand different ways the most important thing to remember and the easiest to forget: You’re going to be okay.
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But that should not hold you back from loving deeply. The pain that comes from deep love makes your love ever more fruitful. I realize the most difficult task for a person with a broken heart is to stand still and feel the crack. But that is exactly what she must do. Because no shortcut is without its share of obstructions. Not around it. By going through the intense pain, I eventually surfaced as a stronger person ready to tackle problems head on.
Having your heart broken is a truly harrowing and overwhelming event. While it may feel like the world as you have known it is has ended, it does not mean that your future cannot be bright and filled with love. While heartbreak does take time to overcome, you really will feel like yourself again. In the mean time, there are many things you can do to help mend your broken heart. It's normal to have deep feelings of pain and fear after a breakup. Amy Chan, founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, says: "According to neuroscientist Jaak Panksepp, rejection and separation from a loved one can plunge us into a 'primal panic. Try to stay busy.
Maybe it came out of nowhere and hit you like a ton of bricks, or, perhaps, you feared the day would come but tried to avoid the conversation. Breakups are usually one-sided—one person walks off into the horizon while the other is left confused, angry, and sad. At this point, pretty much anything feels better than the pain you are feeling. So, go ahead and block the person from all of your social media, delete them from your contacts on your cell phone, and rip up all of those heartfelt letters where you still reigned supreme. They include:.
Author Henri Nouwen writes, “When those you love deeply reject you, leave you, or die, your heart will be broken. But that should not hold you back from loving.
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You find strength in learning from your mistakes. Emotional pain sometimes feels physical, but it still heals in time. Is there any way to measure heartbreak in real terms? Considering heartbreak is all about feelings, it certainly manages to affect you physically. Lethargy, literal heartache, exhaustion… the list goes on and on. But like most physical injuries, even this pain will heal with time, as hard as that is to believe.
There are no perfect guidelines to navigating the fallout from failed relationships. Focus on self-care in this time. Give yourself the treatment you need and be patient with yourself. Many well-meaning friends might say to move on by finding someone new right away; instead, try taking time to be with yourself. We can learn so much about ourselves when relationships end.